Yet again Belle sent us through a loop. Is it fair to ask Bob or Bean to change their patterns and behaviors so that Belle doesn’t have a melt down?
J made sure to send me a picture of her smiling as she left his car for camp…
You read correctly, we made it to see Wall.E — it was brilliant! Just BRILLIANT!
OK – we’ll backtrack. We got home from camp/school at 4:30 – I rushed to put in the salmon and make dinner..but it was too hot and took too long for us to leave at our designated time of 5:15 to make the 5:45 movie. So sandwiches it was – Tuna for Belle, 2 PBJ for Bob, melted cheese for Bean and PBJ for Puppy, throw a PBJ for me too….(no vegi, no fruit) water in the car!
We made it out, and to the movie — using gift coupons that I had received for my birthday at least 3 years ago, if not more- the 5 of us walked in, and I got $1.50 back! (J came on his own and paid, so I don’t even know what that cost!)
Bob held my purse and keys, as we proceeded down the escalator — I held Bean as she is TERRIFIED of them and help Puppy’s hand. We got a BIG bucket of popcorn, 4 small cups and 2 med (you can’t tell me they were medium, they looked like a two litter bottle!) drinks, one lemonade and one diet coke — and we were off.
Poor Puppy thought we were going to shul where they had movie night the week before, on the grass with “Cars” projected — this was a bit different…for a sensory kid, but he was a trouper.
An hour and a bit into the movie — Puppy starts saying Penis! Penis! VERY LOUDLY in a quiet theater…there were only about 20 people total in the theater — but when you are paying $12 a ticket, who wants to be interrupted?!?
He continues, Penis! PENIS! PENIS BOY!! Penis BOY! I PENIS BOY!!! I PENIS BOY!!!
OMG J and I were trying so hard not to laugh, Bob was in stiches and the girls kept looking like he was nuts! Remember now – more than an hour into the movie, NO POPCORN left to distract…no paci in site, and Penis Boy yelling PENIS BOY at the top of his lungs….turn to Lemonade!
Sticky, sweet, sticky – ice cold — did I say sticky? But it distracted good’ol penis boy for enough time to get him to forget! I dont’ think the rest of us ever will.
OK, make that “easier”! Belle was able to get her stuff together enough to get out both thursday and friday am. That isn’t to say we didn’t have our moments, but Jeven sent a picture of her smiling in the car on the way to camp.
Today Belle got it together and had a good morning – don’t know why, but it worked. I have to keep reminding myself that she is not doing this to us. That she doesn’t set out to upset us and make us mad. In the anger of a being late for work, for not running smoothly through our “routine’ — I tend to forget.
She is not doing this to me/us.
She wouldn’t do it if she could stop herself.
Belle did it again today. She got up, she got dressed, she even came down and ate breakfast so nicely. Getting ready to leave and she says she is bringing her dog – we say, no, toys are not allowed in camp or school — party line – though we compromised to let her take him in the car on the ride.
As we pull up to drop off Cookoo and Puppy — Belle says, “you know what mommy and abba, you were right, I shouldn’t take my dog to camp, I’m glad I left him at home!”
Boy were we upset — a straight out fabricated lie.
(Fast forward 7 hours and she left the car without permission and crossed the parking lot at the pre-school without a grownup — almost full meltdown over dessert, but we were able to cut it off at the pass…this time.)
When talking to my friend and doula tonight – B – I recounted my day with among other issues, Belle — and I gotta love B — she said:
“wow! she is going to be a great writer when she is older!” A refreshing and creative ending.
We just got back from our impromptu picnic/bicycle ride! It was great — but had we planned it and thought about it — again, wouldn’t have happened. J went and got a new pump, and came home and said he wanted to take the kids to ride — but it was lunchtime….
So I pulled out salami, bread, ketchup, mustard (2 kinds), carrots, peppers, ice water & blueberries — add the picnic blanket, camera — 4 bikes, 4 helmets, wipes – plates, napkins, utencils AND BUG SPRAY — and we were off within 14 minutes flat …nope, could not have planned it.
We took two cars, and with gas prices at $4.22 per gallon, we drove the mile to a local elementary school parking lot — put out our spread, and had the entire lot to ourselves for riding.
Amid the raindrops, and sunshower…Bob took of riding as usual, Belle rode for the first time without training wheeles!! Though did take a spill — Bean didn’t love getting wet, but rode for a bit and Puppy was too funny in his three wheeler — and helmet.
I survived, though I HATE the outside, bugs and all — but I feel proud of myself, I think that I did ok…I did it for my kids. Had I had to think about it, and plan it and worry about it, I don’t think I could have pulled it off… I’m so glad we did.
Happy 4th of July!!
So it started out as a simple – Bob was going to have a playdate with his best bud form birth JM – well JM has a sister EM who is Bean’s age – so they wanted to play…ok god who will we have for Belle? We call AP and she can come, thank god! So now you are thinking that I am leaving out Puppy….no no! That is when it got crazy…
BSP, my oldest and dearest friend from kindergarten gas been telling me about her friend BR and her husband RR, who have a daughter SR who is going to be at school with Puppy…but they also have a son JR who is 18 months old…BSP herself has SPa who is Puppy age and SPb who is 4 months old (yes, both their names start with S — I’m not the only one to mess this up!) so I invited both families….J was aware of this, but what I forgot to tell him….is that when I thought of who was coming — I invited TG — with her three kids – SG who is Bean’s age, LG who is Puppy’s age and NG who is JR’s age so they could meet too….
Needless to say, the 4 year olds were the loudest – the 2 almost 3 year olds cried the most…and some parents handled the noise better than others…
All in all I had a great time, lovely people — and J chose not to divorce me yet!
Can’t take that word anymore – It annoys me when Bob says it, when Bean says it — even when Puppy says it — but when Belle does…it brings on an entirely new meaning…
The repeated nonononononononononononononononononononononono — there are no other words…none, just no in a different pitch, a different cry, a different scream…but it continues…and cries, and screams…as I type — J is dealing with the screams… and trying to calm her, there is no talking – there is no reason…just the repeated no.
What caused it this time? Who knows….she came out of her shower — that she did greatly on her own, she was really cute coming out of the shower — I gave her her towel, and reminded her to be careful coming out, and not to slip…for a second she gave me a VERY weird blank, almost catatonic look…I laughed…and so did she, she snapped into a big smile. I asked her to dry off before she got she left the bathroom, and I would come cuddle once she was in PJ’s.
(8:49 — the screaming has ended — only 31 minutes this encounter)
A few minutes later she jumped into our bed – getting bet between our duvet and the cover — something that drives us nuts, as it rips the cover…. she said she was cold and need to warm up. I asked her to come out of the cover, get her pj’s on, and I would help warm her up under her covers.
That is when the no’s began…(this time)
I helped her into her bed, put on her pj’s and tucked her in — then it continued, the one word chorus, the unending screaches and screams… she undressed and followed me around, screaming she was cold and NO!
J took her into her bed — and somehow got her calm…he said re-direction…asking her what she wanted for lunch tomorrow – snapped her out of it, this time. And then she asked for her winter PJ’s — it is 87 degrees…and she wants winter fleece pj’s – fine, we have air conditioning, and it is getting cooler — but what prevented her from just saying “mommy, I’m cold, can I have my winter PJ’s?” Maybe someday we will know — I’m just thankful J was able to help her out of it this time…he is really good at it, he always has been…patience I need to learn.
Sensory issues, sure — can they be the cause of all these outbursts and meltdowns? We are on the quest to help her….
What a great day! We drove all the way to PA today for a fun filled swim day of family. Aunt J and Uncle R, Cousin J and D, Bubbie, Zaddie, Aunt M from Israel, Grammy and Grandpa, Unc and Lolo, “special Grandma T”– of course Jesse and Keppi the dogs — all met for a wonderful, relaxed day by the pool.
4 generations — much love and more – ration of 2.75 adults per child — much more then we have on any normal day! But to hear Bubbie, my grandma say it was the best day of her life — was awesome! Zaddie even got his feet into the pool — grandma was quite sad, watching all the help he needed to do it, I was too — this strong, brilliant man, dentist, husband, care taker, father to three, grandpa to 9, now great grandpa to 8 has withered… but no matter how we have felt about what has come out of his mouth in the past, we all love him and are there to support both he and grandma…as they have always done for us. I’m so fortunate to have my kids know my grandparents…and love to spend time with them, just like I did…just like they do with my parents…we are all truly blessed.
I am soo done with poop! I get that I have four kids, I get that it is a growing process…I don’t mind changing diapers, never had…I was never the mom to care about that, for god sakes I had 3 kids in diapers at one time…BUT to have my 7 year old, and now my 6 year old – having problems with pooping their pants…I’m SOOOOO DONE!
Just Your Average Adventure 